4th
So this afternoon I had a music class and I knew Jack had a music class next door so after my class finished I waited for his class to finish and then we went over to his house so he could help me with my CS homework. (It turns out x^2 in Java isn’t the same as x squared.) He fixed my wireless (it hadn’t been working) and ate the bread Nick had baked and he and Doug did math and I read about the mafia and the Daily. And then we moved to the living room, where he and Doug played X-Box and I downloaded rap records. I felt my smartphone vibrate and I looked and it didn’t illuminate like it does when I have a text so I checked my e-mail and then I looked at Morning Mail and saw that there was a lecture on Roman Satire at 5:30 and I looked back at my smartphone and it was 5:26 so I ran back to campus and into the room where the lecture was just beginning.
I sat next to the only other (I think) undergrad in the room. All the professors were in the front row, and graduate students were in the others. I was planning on going to another lecture at 6:30 so I had to check the time on my smartphone continually throughout the lecture, which was pretty rude but what could I do. The lecture finished at 6:30 and I realized there was a clock on the left wall. I had had two classes in that room before and should have remembered that there was a clock on the left wall.
Then I went to the other lecture, which was called “Local Knowledge” and was sponsored by my school’s center for public service and made me feel kinda guilty of being white. Also I was there so I could learn about things to write about, while everyone else there was already involved in cool community service stuff. After the lecture finished I went downstairs and saw my friend Jonathan, who’s having a party tonight. I told him to serve caipirinhas and that I was gonna send a couple e-mails, and then I opened my laptop and googled caipirinhas and my wireless wasn’t working. So I left and saw Benson and told him I was going home to write e-mails and he asked me for one so I sent him the Swanson pyramid of greatness and the video of Denim doing “Middle of the Road” on Later…with Jools Holland and the “Hey Ladies” video.
And then I tried to set up my online TV thing but it doesn’t work with Chrome so I had to launch Firefox and it didn’t start working until 9:06 and I was nervous I was missing Parks & Rec but it was only the Office. And then I watched Parks & Rec alone in my room and laughed really loud at a couple of jokes and tweeted one of them (the bit where Ron talks about the diner with the “four horsemeats of the egg-pork-olypse” or something like that) and texted my brother “This episode is amazing.” Except I think the romance between Ann Perkins and Rob Lowe’s character doesn’t really work. Like Ann Perkins isn’t an innately funny character and the writers have struggled to make her funny from the gitgo (I remember some funny stuff about her making Mark Brendaniwicz watch goofy romantic comedies with her, but that was a while ago.), and Rob Lowe’s character just talks in clipped rhythms, which was kind of funny at first but isn’t any more. And then I texted Jack “Wussup” and watched Jersey Shore and read Twitter in the commercial breaks.
And then it was 11:00 and I was about to text Jack again but I realized I had to hand in my CS homework. I tried to do it the fancy way but I couldn’t figure out which files to turn in so finally I made a .zip file and e-mailed it to myself and shaved in a much-needed shower.
When I got out of the shower it was 11:30 so I figured I had time to grab a slice of pizza on my way to the Computer Science department so I went to the Gate and got a slice of pizza but when I tried to pay with my school ID it didn’t work and the cashier gave me back my school ID and I realized it was my old idea which I had lost a year ago and had cancelled, but then someone found it and it still had money on the vending stripe (which didn’t get cancelled) so I kept it even though I had a new school ID. And then I offered the cashier cash or said she could just type in my ID number and she tried typing in my ID number and it didn’t work so finally she just took three of the four singles in my wallet
Then I went to the Computer Science department and handed in my homework and decided to go to the ATM in the campus center except when I got to the campus center I realized I needed my school ID to get into the campus center. And then I ran into some friends who invited me to come to a party with them but then the two of them who were dating wanted to go home and started walking ahead of everyone else and told me to come with them. And the boyfriend yelled at his friends to come and the girlfriend got mad at him for yelling. And then that happened again. None of them were wearing coats except for the boyfriend, who was wearing his girlfriend’s. Finally the couple decided to go home without everyone else so I headed to the party with the other two and told them my story and texted Kate to see if she could let me into our dorm (need a school ID for that too). (I had called her twice and she hadn’t picked up.)
I pointed out that my friends weren’t wearing coats and they said they had come from a dress-up party and I said “You wear jeans to a dress-up party?” and they said it was a ’90s hip hop themed party and they were dressed as the Beastie Boys. And I thought “the Beastie Boys didn’t wear skinny jeans” but I didn’t say it. And then we went to the party and I didn’t know anyone there but I knew of them because they were either rich Europeans or had gone to lame New York private schools. So I finished my drink and left and Kate called me back and I walked home and she let me in and I wrote this while listening to Divine Styler’s Spiral Walls Containing Autumns of Light. It took about 50 minutes.
